Why? Well because it’s gay. And how does the common gamer determine that this game is gay? Well, it’s simple, you see. These characters are muscled and wearing nothing but their thongs. If they’re burly and in thongs, they must be gay, which makes this game gay. Oh, and did I mention this game uses rainbows? That alone makes it gay, right?
Yes, if you read the above paragraph and sighed, then you share my feelings exactly. People once again heaping labels atop a game that’s just… well… incredibly random. Like, impossibly random. For Pete’s sake people, there’s a muscle-bound polar bear up there in that row of men/the single woman! A polar bear! Polar bears don’t work out in gyms! (Unless I’m completely missing something when I’m going to the gym. It’s possible.) And that man has a bird in his afro! And… and… things!
It’s certainly very much embedded in the Japanese culture, as all this game is about is 8 burly characters chase after another person through multiple levels for whatever reason Namco-Bandai chose at the time. As the chase is conducted, the target smashes through walls, leaving holes that are perfectly shaped for body builders! Each character must do a specific flex to get through the wall, otherwise they collide into it and are cast out from the game. As the chase continues, it gets faster and faster, forcing the player to move quickly to get into position for the next flex. If this doesn’t sound completely off the wall, then I don’t know what does. Will the E-10 content rating last? I hope so, as this game perfectly falls into the E-10 category of lighthearted cartoon randomness that barely passes as making sense.
It’s cartoon mischief at its finest, yet I’m sure we’ll hear someone complain about homosexual content being aimed at children in the game, just as we’re hearing gamers cry “gay” at the mere sight of it. I’m not exactly sure when the oily bodybuilder type became a symbol of someone being gay but then again I’m also not sure why so many militant straight people don’t find the “football ass smack” as a type of homosexual behavior.
So remember people. It’s bad for your children to be bodybuilders because it’s homosexual, but there’s nothing wrong with a good ass grab at the end of a 40-yard-touchdown pass. Hoo-rah.