Tell The Oatmeal What It’s Really Like to Game as a Woman

Edit: Since this post was made, creator of The Oatmeal, Matthew Inman, made a much better apology post and actually donated to the Women Against Abuse organization.  

It pains me to make this post, because I’ve been reading The Oatmeal for a long time and have generally found it humorous. However, today he posted a pretty ridiculous comic making the claim that terrible female gamers get away with much more than male gamers.

A cartoon of a female gamer playing a shooter. She says "Oops! I accidentally called an airstrike on our team for the fourth time in a row! tee-hee!". Her teammates say things like "As a gamer, you inspire me." and "Aww, that's okay. I love Napalm!"

 

Hey, Oatmeal:

You know what actually sucks about being a woman who games?  Being harassed because of my gender.  People not taking me seriously because as a woman, I can’t possibly be good at games.  Not being able to stream live videos of my gaming because people will make sexist comments about me instead of talking about the game.  Having people assume that I beg for everything in games instead of earning it myself.  Reading incredibly sexist chat constantly.  Not being able to talk on voice chat without the conversation being all about me.  When I make a mistake in games, it’s because I’m a woman trying to play games.  When you make a mistake, you just suck at the game and made a mistake.  Try that on for size.

Come back to me when you have these problems, because right now I have a really hard time feeling sorry for you.

The Border House, feel free to tell @Oatmeal on Twitter how you feel about this cartoon, and that his apology didn’t really solve the fundamental issues with his comic.

52 thoughts on “Tell The Oatmeal What It’s Really Like to Game as a Woman”

    1. That’s a bit better as an apology than the first one he made on the matter (the non-apology: http://oatmeal.tumblr.com/post/21331005941/my-comic-about-online-gaming-as-a-girl ), aside from the insults he chose to list in all-caps, and of course the pervasive ableist slurs (which far too few people seem to care about). Oh, and the fact that the bolded text calls into question women’s reports of abuse during online gaming. (“Is this true?” “my view of things is probably very skewed”)

      And to answer the post’s title question: no, it’s not all fine and dandy on the PC gaming scene, either, and this includes multiplayer through Steam. But hooray that his experiences as a man gaming in Left4Dead through Steam have shown him otherwise, I suppose.

  1. The non-apology (it’s not an apology, at all) is really just him trying to mansplain why his comic is “still true” :x

    Hopefully a few people out there will learn from this situation, instead of rushing to the Oatmeal’s defense. I can already see quite a few “It’s just a joke” and “Lighten up” (and worse) types of comments :c

  2. Really? No one is satisfied with that apology and a donation? That seemed pretty honest to me that he made the comic from a very privileged perspective (having no idea what sort of crap gaming women actually go through), then had upset people telling him otherwise. He then explained his perspective when he made the comic and acknowledged his ignorance and said “I’m sorry for making a stupid comic today.” No knee-jerk arguments saying “No, YOU GUYS are wrong!” or any belittling of women gamers or people who were upset by the comic that I can see. I’m not sure what else he could have done to appease the offended. That said, like Llamaentity says hopefully people learn from these situations.

    1. (To clarify, I am talking about his most recent apology- I agree that the original response was definitely not satisfactory. :/ )

    2. I like his 2nd response better (the first one is definitely a knee-jerk “you guys are wrong” like we didn’t understand it – no, we understood), and of course $1000 is nothing to snort at. However , I still have this icky feeling that it took 2 response and “guys” to tell him something that he would actually believe this time. And I really don’t get the feel that he’s learned anything, he’s just doing whatever it takes to get people to calm down. It’s throwing money at the problem; it doesn’t feel like a sincere realization.

      The Belvedere fiasco (vodka ad with a “non-consensual” woman photo) ended with an apology and a donation, but the whole thing still leave me blah. Here’s a post from the Feministe that explained why: http://www.feministe.us/blog/archives/2012/03/26/belvedere-apologizes-but-what-do-we-want/

    1. Yeah, it’s great that he donated money to a worthy cause, but the Oatmeal has a history of posting really awful shit like the one you linked, so today’s comic wasn’t surprising in the least. Just more of the same.

    2. Damn, what?

      Not that I’m saying Inman’s never posted anything problematic otherwise, but I’ve never seen anything from him quite like that before o_O

    3. Just… serious bleh. That combined with the comic in the article above and it informs me more enough that I should stay clear of this dude and this comic.

  3. It’s absolutely true that in public voice chat (especially on consoles, and on PC FPS titles like BF, COD, ET) that childish behavior and homophobic abuse is par for the course.

    It’s also true that female players (or players who are thought to be female by other male players) are treated differently, most noticeably in MMO titles (I rarely, if ever, hear girls on voices on FPS or console games, which is why I suspect I’ve mostly – but not exclusively – observed it in MUD’s and MMO’s).

    This sometimes includes abusive treatment (most often unwanted attention but also malicious harassment) but also being patronized and easily forgiven for screwing up because they are perceived as “only girls”. This behavior can be born of our misguided attempts to be inclusive. All of this mirrors behavior in other environments outside of online gaming.

    ***It’s entirely undesirable, just as childish and homophobic abuse is, and admitting that this happens doesn’t make it a good thing nor does it mean other bad things don’t happen.***

    The comic absolutely rings true to me, and I didn’t think it was for a moment insinuating that women are worse at games than men. I think it’s odd that some of you apparently thought that was actually the point of the comic (and – it seems – are still choosing to think that it was, despite protestations to the contrary by the artist).

    When I read it, I thought the point of the comic was to point out the discrimination and creepy, patronizing behavior of male players (the dialog makes that really clear, I mean it’s super creepy for comic effect – though sadly not that far off the mark in some cases – just as the level of gleeful ineptitude displayed by the protagonist is exaggerated).

    Personally, I always play male avatars in MMO because I like RP and it’s easier for me to identify with a male avatar. When I ask some of male friends (both “IRL friends” and “in-game friends”) why they always role *female* avatars – the deference shown to them by other (male) players is cited as the reason why. Interestingly, it’s also a primary reason cited in online surveys trying to workout why so many men chose to roll female avatars in MMO’s but not in offline RPG’s like Elder Scrolls games.

    1. For me, it comes across as degrading to women for one primary reason: the difference between the portrayal of the male gamer who messes up and the female gamer who does. He knows what to do, and he tries, but it’s a really difficult task and he makes a mistake and then apologizes for it. There is no doubt in that panel that the disgusting reactions from the other players are what’s (rightfully) meant to be seen as the problem here. The guy is being apologetic and responsible, he’s trying to do the right thing.

      The woman? Not. She’s shown as a vapid, ditzy, giggly, useless dead weight. Nothing in that panel implies that she has any clue, any skill, any desire to learn, any desire to really own up to her mistakes, nor any regret for causing the other players grief. That is what pisses me off. Why is the “premise” for the two panels so vastly different?

      1. Thanks for this comment Korva, I’m ashamed to say I wasn’t previously certain as to exactly which aspect of the comic was so problematic (not that I’m discounting the possibility of other problems, of course; it’s a difficult subject to safely satirise).

        I’m replying to highlight this explanation as, reading these comments it seems that there might be other men who were similarly unclear as to the reasons for the anger the comic caused.

        As far as I see it (feel free to correct, I’m fairly new to this scene – I’m more putting forward my opinion to check that it’s valid, rather than to imply that it is), the comic could have potentially made a useful comment on the sexism women face when gaming, in that people are patronising and creepy towards them, and merely generically abusive to men. However, it shot itself in the foot by portraying the male and female gamers as so different in their attitudes, reinforcing a harmful stereotype of girl gamers while it was at it.

        I guess it could have worked better if the woman had been portrayed similarly to the man: obviously skilled but making a mistake – probably with some eye-rolling at the rediculous response her apology evoked.

      2. What Korva said. It is vastly different in order to show something genuinely negative about women gamers. A generalization at large since these two references are the primary compare/contrast imagery.

        If it wanted to show the creepiness, patronizing, and double-standard such and such, then the woman need not be portrayed as some inept, unqualified, dizzy stereotype.

        1. Also worth nothing that the panel was originally titled “Online gaming when you’re a girl,” without the “making a mistake” qualifier from the current version., making the generalization going on even worse.

      3. This; plus, based on the original comic and the first follow-up post (not the actual apology, which was good) it was pretty clear it was coming from a place of “girl gamers have it so much better!” — he literally said that women can “get away with more” than guys can, which is the exact opposite of reality. Maybe the phrases from the guys were meant to be creepy, but it was framed as something that was BENEFICIAL to women, not something we actually don’t want and are creeped out by.

  4. Soo. What sheltered little corner of the gaming world did he grow up in if he never heard all the gender-based expressions of contempt and degradation? Sissy. Girly. Bitch. Cunt. Whore. Like a girl. Your mother. Not to mention the countless uses of the r-word or “memes” like “pix pls” or “tits or GTFO”. In the light of all that, I call bullshit on a man not having an idea what it’s like to be a female gamer. All he needs to do is open his eyes and engage his brain as well as a little thing called empathy instead of falling back on the double whammy of girls being stupid AND privileged.

  5. In his defence, I’ve been gaming online for well over a decade and I have seen women getting preferential treatment a lot more than I have seen them getting abuse. That includes the seven years I was with my ex when she was gaming for hours a day because it helped her cope with some mental health issues (and it was something to do when her insomnia was particularly bad.) I mention this because while I certainly don’t personally know what it’s like to be a woman playing games online, I have spent a large amount of time watching and listening to a woman playing games online.

    I’m not for one moment questioning anyone’s experiences, the fact that there is a horrendous amount of misogynist abuse being thrown around in online gaming and that women are specifically targeted for abuse because of their gender. I’m just pointing out that his experience of online play is just as valid as anyone else’s and that it’s entirely possible that he hasn’t come across this kind of terrible behaviour online.

    I do feel that it represents a failure on the part of the gaming media and the community as a whole. That someone who plays games online could be unaware how much this stuff goes on just shows how little it’s actually talked about outside of social justice circles. It’s also depressing how much abuse he’s got for the terrible crimes of writing from a position of privilege and having experiences that don’t match up with someone else’s. Allies are gained with education, not abuse.

    1. I don’t feel obliged to respond to a degrading stereotype with an “education” he could’ve gotten from 10 seconds on Google and actually paying attention to the everyday lingo and behavior of many gamers — unless he’s lucky enough to play and move exclusively in circles where sexist (and other) hatespeech simply does not happen, which I doubt. So, yes, this sort of thing does represent a failure on the part of gamers and the “community”.

      Also, the preferential treatment is generally not all that if you think about it even for a moment. It’s not true politeness and human decency when there’s an ulterior motive behind it, i.e. wanting to hit on her (or more). I can only speak for myself, but I prefer to face up-front nastiness rather than barely veiled attempts to gain sexual favors. Those attempts are usually followed by abuse anyway if you shoot them down or ignore them.

    2. It’s also depressing how much abuse he’s got for the terrible crimes of writing from a position of privilege

      What abuse has he gotten exactly (not a rhetorical question) and why are you hyperbolizing privilege like it’s not some awful thing to throw around (which it is)?

    3. I apologise if I do seem to be derailing. I know I’m on incredibly shaky ground, which is why I almost deleted my post after writing it. Yes, I’m writing from a man’s perspective, but that’s because I’m a man. I’d rather participate in discourse on gender issues as a man than stay silent on them. If I think another guy is being a misogynistic turd, I’ll say so, but I’ll also speak up if I think a guy has made a genuine mistake and is being treated too harshly.

      I am very aware of the use of the tone argument, however I have seen “Oh, you’re just using the tone argument” used to defend personal attacks and other unsavoury behaviour. To take the stepping on someone’s toes analogy one step further, while someone stepping on your toes should get off whether you ask nicely or not, that doesn’t make it acceptable for you to punch them in face without even attempting to ascertain whether or not it was an accident, especially without giving them the opportunity to say sorry.

      Minorities aren’t responsible for education, but it certainly helps. It just seems to be an obvious thing to me. I’m overweight and I have mental health problems. If someone makes a joke that crosses over the line and offends me, I tell them. I don’t accuse them of being bigoted or hurl abuse back. Most of the time. I’ve certainly had times when I’ve been hurt and angry and lashed out, but I recognise that it isn’t the best response. People should educate themselves, but you can’t really fault someone for not looking into a problem they didn’t realise existed.

      Korva, I totally agree with the preferential treatment does actually exist on the same scale as the openly misogynistic abuse. It drives me up the wall. It caused no end of problems in WoW guilds I was in as a fair number of guys would fall over themselves to ingratiate themselves with the women in the guild. It was actually what I picked up on reading the comic. From my perspective, it was a comic mocking the guys who behave like that, rather than any commentary on the women who are on the receiving end of that behaviour.

      Being in a position of privilege doesn’t make you a bad person. It wasn’t until I read a very helpful description of privilege on this very blog that I really got my head around the concept. My misunderstanding of it certainly caused me to be overly defensive in the past. He’s a man writing about his experiences of playing online. He shouldn’t be criticised for this. What he should be, and has been, criticised for is getting it wrong in a way that has caused offence. I can totally understand being hurt and upset by the comic if you have to put up with abuse online on a regular basis; if there’s one thing worse than someone telling you that you don’t have it bad, it’s them telling you that you have it better than others.

      So yes, the comic was ill-advised and offensive to some. It’s been brought to his attention, he has apologised and put his money where his mouth is. However I think it’s important to recognise that the correct response to someone making a mistake isn’t to call them a sexist prick.

      http://sheiswolf.tumblr.com/post/21332383346/the-oatmeal-my-comic-about-online-gaming-as-a-girl

      1. This is a pretty long mansplainy post which has really rubbed my up the wrong way. Also, as a guy, you may want to tread lightly and may not want to be telling women the ‘correct’ way to respond to sexism. Anger is a totally valid response to people saying harmful/privileged crap; it may not be *your* response, but it sure as hell is valid and as ‘correct’ as anything else. Or maybe women should work on being less ‘shrill’ or ‘hysterical’? Wait, I’m sure I’ve heard that one before…

        1. Anger is a perfectly valid response, personal attacks are not. I’m sorry if you have an issue with this, but I consider it a fairly basic part of how to interact with other people. It has nothing to do with gender or any other issue.

          1. Maybe I’ve missed something, but where are these “personal attacks”? I searched this page and the only result I found for “sexist prick” was in your post.

            1. There were more blog responses similar to the one I posted on the Oatmeal site. I’m not suggesting that anyone here was doing it. That’s why I like this blog.

            2. I’m not suggesting that anyone here was doing it.

              If no one here is/was doing what you were complaining about, then why are you defending him here? If you have an issue with how others responded to his sexist comic, then I think that you should take it up with them and not the bloggers and readers of TBH.

      2. Jonathan, I don’t think you’re a “bad guy” here, more like giving the benefit of doubt where it’s not warranted because, as I said before, if that guy had engaged his brain (and his empathy) for even a short while, he would have realized two things:

        1) The “point” of his comic is totally off. Most of the time, all the “special treatment” we get is misogynistic hatespeech on top of all the crap that male players get as well.

        2) The portrayal of the female gamer is a degrading stereotype.

        It doesn’t take a course in gender studies, all it takes is honestly looking and listening at what’s actually going on — and especially listening to women who tell of their experiences. Such a simple, basic thing, yet many fail at it because they prefer to talk AT us, not TO us. That allows them to feel good about their “open-mindedness” without actually challenging themselves. Then, when we inevitably get pissed off, they declare themselves oppressed by the evil feminazis who hate men too much to possibly have any real point. That is part of why many women and minorities react rather negatively to the claim that we should bear the burden of educating others. It often ends badly because the other person never actually wanted to learn anything from or about us.

        For what it’s worth, I’m glad for the guy’s actual, follow-up apology in the form of the donation. If his country is anything like mine (Germany), then women’s shelters and support for the victims of violent crime in general is a distant twentieth fiddle in politicians’ concerns, so money is always desperately needed.

    4. You should have stopped at “I don’t personally know what it’s like to be a woman playing games online.”

      This mansplaining session is one of the worst I’ve ever seen.

      A quick trip to “Fat Ugly or Slutty” could have shown him how most of the time, women are NOT given the nice “Oh, you have a voice of an angel” treatment. AT ALL.

      Hell, half the posts on this website ALONE show this.

      But of course, it’s ALWAYS women who have to educate men on their own frickin misogyny instead of them actually taking the time out to EDUCATE THEMSELVES on how their male privilege is a harmful thing. I suggest you go and do some Feminist 101, sir. You need it badly.

    5. Cheers, by pulling the “us guys have it sooooo hard among all the man-haters here” card, you’ve fully convinced me you’re just trolling.

  6. In his defence, the authur doesn’t seem to write the comics. He apparently draws the results from a random meme generator.

    So it’s not his fault he was given “sexism+CoD+voice chat” instead of the usual “cats+dancing+facebook”.

    1. It’s not like he’s being forced to draw it, though, is it? And he still makes a conscious choice to draw it, and also to choose how he draws it.

  7. Personally, I have encountered online female gamers who do behave in a similar, albeit far less exaggerated way. Sexist guys will be extremely nice to female players no matter what; it is incredibly disgusting on their part. A lot of the problem is how oriented games are to men, even today. Female characters are often over sexualized and under characterized. That is slowly starting to change though.

    Oddly enough, one of the “manliest” franchises spawned a game with a very strong female character that lacks almost any sexualiziation. Granted it is in a setting that is ravaged by horrible war, but it seems like a step in the right direction. Changing our games can change our gamers.

    http://www.videodetective.com/games/warhammer-40-000-space-marine/301520

    1. Sexist guys will be extremely nice to female players no matter what

      If this was true, then fatuglyorslutty.com would not exist.

  8. This is problematic for all the reasons we are discussing in the comments section and for the irritating, typical sexist bullcrap that comes with these tired ‘jokes’ and ‘social commentary on online gaming.’ It is clear that he (the writer) has no clue what it means to be a women in the gamingsphere. Plus, you know, the ‘a girl gamer’ bit.

    Moreover, I was annoyed and irritated by the use of homophobic hatespeech in the dude’s panel. Is it something heard within the gaming community? Yes. Is homophobia a problem? Yes. But I just don’t find it offers anything to the commentary, or the ‘joke,’ or that any of those pejoratives is really needed here. It’s not even relevant to the joke’s compare/contrast of gender, imo. Eh, it’s just something else that hit me the wrong way.

  9. Positive sexism is still what I encounter the most after having been a female gamer for over 25 years. it seems to be a very hard concept to see through, especially if you are not affected; how what you supposedly consider an ‘advantage’ for women, really stems from the sexist view that they cannot be taken seriously or be as skilled as men in the first place. yay for being excused from sucking because well, you’re a woman right….NOT.
    /sigh

  10. I really did not like his Xbox Live/Steam comparison in the second response. It just reminded of too many computer gamers who stereotype console gamers as homophobic, swear-spewing 13-year-olds. Like those guys who panicked when it was announced Minecraft would have a console version, saying that this would INEVITABLY bring immature frat boys to their precious game. Of course, they have to ignore the immense amount of hate going on in online computer games in order to fully believe this.

    And no, I have no idea why I singled out THAT to comment on. It seems that relatively minor stuff gets a bigger response from me than bigger problems such as casual sexism. Or maybe I can’t think of anything to say that hasn’t already been said at least a couple times by others.

  11. I’d go out on a limb and say that it’s almost worse for a female gamer online if she is skilled – both the patronizing headpats directed at a woman gamer who makes a mistake and the “fat, ugly, or slutty” vitriol directed at woman gamers who wipe the floor with their male counterparts come from exactly the same place: the assumption that women are incompetent. Or, at least, not as competent as their male peers. Thus, if she’s not very good, that’s all fine and dandy (even perhaps in a case where a male gamer might be given the third degree if he was similarly unskilled); if she is skilled, she’s a threat. She’s stepped out of her place as the “casual” or the “gamer girlfriend”, and has to be hammered back into it with insults.

    Of course there’s the infuriating assumption that the woman in the comic is stupid and giggly and not even trying, whereas the man is putting in an earnest effort and made a simple mistake. That’s BS. N00bs is noobs. They all make stupid and careless mistakes, regardless of gender. I’ve never seen a male gamer get read the riot act for a mistake unless it was a) spectacularly stupid, and b) he’d clearly logged enough hours to know better. Chewing out someone on their first time would be pointless and dissuade them from continuing; was he actually checking the player history to see if his fellow gamers weren’t – and quite reasonably I might add – giving her headpats because she was a new player? And being harder on him because he was experienced enough to know better?

    Rarely do I see women gamers willing to brave the hornet’s nest that is online multiplayer unless they’re willing to take the game seriously. At LAN parties? Women who aren’t interested (your proverbial gamer girlfriend who just came over to socialize) are perfectly upfront about their lack of interest, and if you cajole them into playing anyway, you might logically expect they aren’t going to take it as seriously as your clan buddies. I’ve met precisely two of these mythical giggly, vapid, unwilling to learn but making a pretense of taking it seriously unicorns in my life – one was a woman, yes, but the other was her husband. They’re big RPG fans, but sometimes they show up to our LAN parties if Diablo and whatnot is on the menu. At one point we were playing L4D and needed a fourth player; this dude was off somewhere else, so his wife opted in. She was brand new to shooters period, so we were all very patient, teaching her how to play, and over time she learned the ropes, so we started going for achievements. We asked her what role she’d like to play and gave her what we thought were helpful instructions; when one of the special infected came along we’d tell her how to beat it, when to go for ammo, ask her for help, give her help, etc. But after a while of getting nowhere it became pretty obvious she wasn’t listening to us. She wouldn’t follow us to our secondary defensive position when we’d decided to retreat, get overwhelmed, and get killed. Or she wouldn’t get the weapon we needed, she’d get a different one. And the like. I could tell the other two dudes were getting really frustrated, but they didn’t want to chew out their buddy’s wife. So I finally asked her what the deal was, and she said: “it’s no fun for me if all I do is what you tell me to do, so I’ve been doing the opposite on purpose so you have to restart, you’re so funny when you’re mad, lol”. Needless to say – far from the “awww, it’s okay” that the comic implies would happen – we never invited her to play with us again.

    Her husband did something similar. He wanted to beat the spec ops missions in MW2 and he was having a really hard time (as I said, they’re primarily RPG players, this isn’t their forte) so he invited me over to help since I’ve got the platinum. We were doing a stealth mission and I had all the timing more or less memorized, so I gave him instructions. But every time we’d get spotted, and he’d blame me, which was really confusing, because I’d beaten the level dozens of times on much harder difficulties. So I finally started screen-watching him, and sure enough, he was doing the opposite of what I told him to do. Which is… well… okay you play how you want to play, but if he didn’t want help, why did he bother inviting me over? His response “lol it’s no fun just doing what you tell me to do”. I tried to explain to him that this was co-op, and if he died (which he always did, because he wasn’t a good enough player to run off on his own) we both died and had to restart the level. I don’t know what their damage is, but after I related said story to our other gaming buddies, we haven’t played with him again, either.

    Sorry for the rant, but frankly, in my lived experience I’ve only run into two deliberately obtuse noobs, and they were an even split along gender lines.

    1. Yikes. I can kinda understand not wanting to just “mindlessly”* follow orders, but the proper response is to say as much, then back out of the game and/or take a break and discuss, not to troll the rest of the team or the helper one specifically invites. Sorry for your poor experience, Ari.

      *As in, not understanding the point of the orders or having a good understanding of game concept. Player hasn’t yet internalized the concept, and probably hasn’t done the reading. Doing things without knowing *why* one’s doing them.

    2. Sorry, forgot my second point. “I don’t know what their damage is” reads (to me) like it’s assuming the trolling players have some sort of brain damage, and but for that brain damage they’d be acceptable players.

      Trouble is, neurological issues and trollish behavior aren’t necessarily linked. Thus, the statement seems ableist. I’m not sure that you consciously intended to convey that, but there it is. Respectfully suggest something like “I’m not sure what their problem was” in future.

      –KA101, autistic and gaming for probably two decades now, if not longer

      1. Er, sorry about that I didn’t even think about it being taken that way. I’ll refrain from using it in future.

  12. I just noticed that something’s missing. Then I realized what that something was…and now I don’t miss it at all. :-)E>

    Good job by the mods. Thanks much.

  13. Don’t know why, but I’ve never been treated any different in our WoW groups. Maybe it is because I play on a RP server or maybe it is because of our language region. I’ve made pick up groups for raiding so far and participated in normal groups as well. The only time I’ve been harassed by a bigoted moron he’d thought that I was a man in the first place and continued to rant when I told him I was not.
    But… I happen to get “mature” groups more often than others. When looking for random players to invite to my groups, I try to avoid those who sound like a 10 year old that has just learned how to write half a sentence. And I’m even getting the occasional 12 year old from time to time (and they happen to be quite nice :D )

    What I want to say is that the members of gaming culture are not always sexist. Especially not in my region. Patronizing sexism is something that would get me furious, especially when I’m already an expert in said game. But I guess that won’t happen to me as easily as I’m more than often group leader or co-leader…

    And yes, the oatmeal strip needed to be shown that there is another side to this topic, too. Even if it was meant as a joke and I do not find it that offensive.

  14. You know what sucks about being a woman who games?

    If someone asks and I say I’m a woman, they might say NO GURLS ON INTERNET PROBABLY A TRAP ANYWAY.

    Which is not only irritating in it’s own right, due to sexism, assumed-male privilege, and generally obnoxiousness, but also serves as a reminder that because i’m transgender, these people refuse to see me as a woman.

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